I was innocently standing in line at the Barnes and Noble, when I looked at the register in front of me to find the gentleman paying for his new James Patterson novel while wearing a sweater, khaki pants and some sort of futuristic reptile Mary Jane thing. Imagine my surprise when, upon closer glance, I discovered that I could see each individual toe, outlined in this sorry excuse for a shoe.
I was stunned. To think that someone would actually put these on outside of a Halloween party or some sort of performance art piece depicting the plight of the North American Tree Frog makes me visibly cringe.
Apparently these monstrosities are the fault of some company that wanted to replicate the "feeling" of being barefoot. And then some douchebag runner started talking about how great it is to run barefoot. They've even got Time Magazine fooled - they were named as one of the best inventions of 2007. You know what? Running sucks with shoes on. Pretending to run barefoot is not going to make it better.
You want to protect your feet? Stay away from me while wearing these shoes. Because I will totally stomp on them.
I have webbed toes and I resent these shoes as well. :(
ReplyDeleteThese shoes have changed my life and opened my world up to a knowledge that things can exist outside of the norm. Walking around in freedom is what we were designed to do. I'm not an old chinese woman and do not want my feet to be bound any longer. Vive la foot revolucion!
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